


the duality of man, or mutant

by orphan_account



Category: Young Avengers
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Brotherly Bonding, Gen, M/M, Multi, tommy centric what else is new
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-12
Updated: 2016-07-12
Packaged: 2018-07-23 12:33:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7463478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy is there for Billy. In the process, he tries to be there for himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	the duality of man, or mutant

**Author's Note:**

> written for a tumblr prompt. follow me @hoevarr to see other writing i dont post here, and complaining, etc. feel free to prompt me.

Tommy didn’t know what he was doing. He wasn’t good with the whole emotions thing. He tried, sometimes, but a cocktail of shitty parents, therapists, social isolation, and the usual speedster impulses… It provided a barrier, a sort of psychological separation. He was thankful for that sometimes- it had gotten him through, gotten him to where he was today, but he would be nobody’s first-choice shoulder to cry on, which he thought was probably best. 

But Billy? Billy, in a word, was soft. In many ways, he was Tommy’s opposite. It wasn’t a bad thing, not reality- there was a duality to them, a sort of yin-yang to their relationship which carried over to the team. Wherever they needed Tommy’s reckless bull-headedness, Billy would be in the aftermath to glue the team back together, a hot-chocolate-and-blankets type of love. When the dark cloud that seemed to perpetually lurk around the edges of Billy’s mental state threatened to creep into the edges of his thoughts, or permeate the team, Tommy was there to chase it off and come skidding back into the room with a smile and a Starbucks order he’d swiped off the counter. They balanced each other out when nobody else could. This was one of those times. 

From an outsider’s perspective, it just looked like a slim, sad boy with glassy, sunken eyes sitting in front of a window, watching the evening rain. But to anyone who knew better? This was bad. 

Tommy stepped away from Billy’s open bedroom door, unacknowledged by his twin. He felt slower, suddenly, like his feet were made of lead; like he’d swallowed a pit. Maybe it was some kind of twin telepathy thing, but he’d been feeling this persistent, vague sense of wrongness for months. 

He’d called Teddy. Tommy never called first. In the time it took for a person to pick up the phone, he could already be at their house with Chinese takeout. It generally wasn’t a practice he found efficient. Something, though… Something told him it was a bad idea to just show up at Billy’s place. An inkling in his gut told him that a call to his brother would go unanswered. But where Billy could be found, so could Teddy, and Tommy knew that where Billy might spare him the details for fear of being a burden, Teddy wouldn’t hesitate to spill, so long as he wasn’t breaching Billy’s privacy. 

He had Teddy on speed-dial. Teddy, who was normally so bright and full of energy. Teddy, who currently sounded drained, his voice cracking with tired, restrained emotion. 

He went over. Billy’s family was out, sparing him the obligatory hellos that always left him feeling so out of place. He raced up the stairs, stopping in a hazy blur to peer in the open door of his twin’s bedroom. 

Time felt somewhat foreign to Tommy- to anyone who could manipulate or outrun it, it was a meaningless institution designed to confuse and madden- and right now, he felt trapped in time, something he’d not felt since juvie. He wished, for once, that he didn’t bottle up his emotions to the point of numbness. Now might be a helpful time to be able to experience one. 

Instead, he went in the room, his tense conversation with Teddy replaying in his head from a few moments ago. 

“Hey, bro,” he said softly, deliberately allowing some space between himself and his brother, announcing his presence as if to avoid a jump-scare. 

Billy glanced over with his eyes, head unmoving, grunting out something unintelligible. 

“You’re not okay.” It was a statement. 

“Doesn’t matter. You can go now,” Billy said, his voice flat. 

“Im not g-” Tommy ran a hand through his hair, at a loss for words. “How long have you been feeling like this?”

Billy shrugged. “Awhile.” 

“You know you can talk to me, right? I’m not always here, I know, it’s shitty, but I- I can be. Faster than you can say my name, or your money back.” He tried to inject some lightness into his voice. 

“I’m sorry. I- I’m not good at this.” 

Still no response from Billy. 

The rest of the conversation is seared into his memory, but he tries to forget it. Fumbling around the words that didn’t want to fall out of his mouth, his twin for the most part looking like a corpse with just the barest breath of life. It wasn’t the result he wanted. He was a coward. He couldn’t do this whole emotions thing, that’s what he told himself as he fled the room, grabbed his bags, talked to Teddy, who was crying now. 

He was pretty sure this conversation had led to him working that shitty desk job, and meeting David, though. And without David, he might still be stuck in hell- and Teddy had proposed, they were getting married soon- you win some, you lose some, right? 

He’d gotten better at the whole emotions thing. Billy was better now too, which helped, but he no longer fled the room when someone started crying. 

It terrified him, opening up. All his life, he had kept his feelings close at hand, never revealed his intentions, steel skin, lies- even to himself at times. But he thought maybe he was getting better. He thought maybe, if Billy could do it, then he could do it too. 

Their relationship was more or less the same as before- balancing act. Now, though, it wasn’t just out of necessity. The twins had actually grown much closer, and Tommy… Well, he enjoyed Billy’s company. It was a mutual feeling- a wrapped in cozy blankets while a thunderstorm raged outside kind of love, a collision of their two personalities, and they dealt with each other when nobody else could. 

Now, though, the rain and the windows were an afterthought. The sunken eyes would be from long night playing video games- Tommy Call of Duty, Billy World of Warcraft. 

Tommy would still grab coffees. David made him swear up and down to actually wait in line, _like a normal person, Tommy, Jesus I can’t keep up,_ and so he did. 

They were no strangers to the double date, now. Tommy would swear up and down it was not a date, it was hanging out, to which David would roll his eyes and smile while his brother and Teddy laughed and cuddled in their ridiculous affectionate way. 

In a diner, drinking a vanilla milkshake and watching his brother look so happy, Tommy’s thigh pressed up against David’s, he thought to himself- _this is what it feels like. I’m happy._

When did he start feeling like this? 


End file.
